I waited for you to cry, to show that I was the one who could break you
But never did I pry, for your fists were clenched too

Let loose your fists, love
For you grip them till blood flows

*

I am illuminatingly blinded – for you are my sun,
far too bright, & too far away
casting black upon on which I stand
that my shadow’s darkness consume me
yet I stare even though I have no more sight
for your warmth is a haven – a personal heaven
you, through eyes I could not hope to see
I am lost, with only love as an inadequate guide

I yearn of you like breathing the summer heat; without fire in my veins, I feel barren
but your flame in my soul burns deep; It sears me – I am filled till I feel stricken
I love you like fields of grains of wheat; coarse and plain but warm as the land
tho I may look filling or taste sweet; I am dull & tired, my taste amazingly bland
& you, my poison, the ever refreshing breeze; I shall bow to you my harvest’s hand
its a poison I would gladly squeeze; for your presence is a sweet addiction I can’t stand

I love you, with all the words that love might endure
but the words are the only thing of which I’m sure
& when you say it, I know that I love you more
before it was lost, you never knew what it was for

all now I could ever but say
it was always, or its never
I wish eternity was but a day
then we would be, forever

but still
it doesn’t mean I’m forfeiting
not until
the last of my breath is leaving

shadows at noon
hide from the luminescence
battles in bloom
light up the abominations

we soil god’s beautiful soil with plagues of hate
of self-justified meals for selfish means
on barbaric, nefarious and heinous plates
then paint them with an obscure & concealing sheen

Repent!
to those in power
and they who cower
the ignorant
the tyrants
Repent!

we are all equal
what differs is our way
of good or evil;
to hold true, or sway

for I follow me blindly, without reserve
crazily foolhardy, I get what I deserve

tis of little concern; of chance, choice or bloody coincidence
for in life – in the little dances – it makes no farkin difference

they tell us left is left & right is right
& we believe
they tell us wrong is wrong & right is right
& we believe
they tell us that day is light & dark is the night
& we believe

who choses them? who are they?

pious philosophers that sit under the stars to dream of specious higher powers,
or soldiers that showcase battle scars & decide violence is always the answer,
or slick suits with hidden agendas that scheme of self-lucrative ventures,
or tree-hugging free-love enigmas who think that everyone is a brother?

the rage of the ages
the curse of the plagues,
an epidemic concocted by the malignant syndrome

the worst of life’s stages
the vague shadow of vices;
our accepted lies, & submission to the palindrome:

of what we are taught
we teach again in return
& when it is fought
we preach to be listened
but when we feel caught
we screech for a new turn
our nature is wrought
to reach without a reason

& then we blame
everything; all but by what we gain
then do the same
everything; everything all over again

we flee from those who chase us, & chase those who from us they flee
we set free what we should confine, & confine what we should set free
we flaunt examples of our powers, when we should lead with the power of example
& our principles easily we compromise, when we should compromise with principle

*insert oxymoronic paragraph*

we judge always by the same differences, but we demand our judges be different
we forget what needs our remembrance, & remember what needs be forgotten

it starts oh so slowly
calm embers with soft glowing veins
then turns suddenly
& drowns your heart in raging flames

& I think of you often
nowadays

you fill me
with dread & anticipation
& hesitance
& curiosity
that feels ethereally real
like waking up
from a dream or
nightmare
that I cannot quite remember
but still scares me
or makes me smile

& I do not know why
this is

I try to find excuses reasons
for you to stay
for me to want you to stay
but it feels like
randomly pushing keys on a piano
each note clear & beautiful
but I cant make them
into a melody

& you deserve to be sung
a grand tune

but come & join me for
this dance
& maybe when
I know of your melodies
& of my notes you can hear
we can make
wonderful music

together

ko konon cool la – lepak, rilek
tapi actually agak cam pantek
kelam kabut campur huru hara entah ke mana
sembang kemain tapi haram menggelabah gila

tolong la jangan perasan ko tu power
padehal org just layan ko je sebenarnya
walaupun kawan-kawan ko saje amik hati
tapi dalam hati diorang rasa nak bunuh diri

memang best la lepak ngan ko kadang-kadang
tapi bagi muka sket, ko tu macam mintak penerajang
sekejap je la, pastu dah start ko jadik menggelupur
lama-lama lepak org pun bole jadi sakit hati doh

ok fine la, ko rasa ko suwit, friendly dan agak charming
aku bole setuju, walau actually lebih kepada annoying
so, relax la beb, cuba ko try chill sket
baru la tak banyak sgt  isu berbangkit

ko tu memang muka tak malu
tolongla jangan buat tak tahu

sebab ko tu, sebenarnya aku